• Hi, I'm Lisa-mommy to my boys, David, 8 and Matty, 6 and wife to Steve. In between school and work we spend our time playing outdoors on the central coast of CA, eating chocolate chip pancakes, tapping tunes on the piano (David) and choreographing elaborate lightsaber duels (Matty). I create handmade jewelry and love taking pictures. Stick around and get to know us!
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thoughts on marriage

us1

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all week i’ve been reflecting on how thankful i am to be married to my sweetie.

in high school i had crushes on the popular boys.  in college i wanted to date boys who had the right ‘look’.  i wasn’t as concerned about what was on the inside, i foolishly thought image was the most important thing.

i dated a few guys pretty seriously.  i fell hard.

then the feelings would fade and eventually we would break up.

then i met steve and although i didn’t have strong feelings of attraction initially, my feelings quickly grew.

but beyond feelings of attraction, i felt respect, admiration and confidence.

this was the man i wanted to spend my life with.

as we dated our friendship grew.

10 years later i can confidently say that, while romance is wonderful, it’s the friendship that carries us through the little daily decisions and the seriously crappy times.

us2

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i’m so glad i married my best friend.

45 Responses to “thoughts on marriage”

  1. Kirsten on December 9th, 2009 11:35 pm

    Lisa, your story sounds so much like mine. I think we might be sisters separated at birth. (You should see my hair, you’d be wondering too). The road I took to find my hubby was almost like yours. I seriously wasn’t ready to find him and didn’t even know what I was looking at when I did. Luckily, he made me feel so good when I was around him I just kept it up. Being friends, and knowing each other so well, liking what you know, is a wonderful thing. Good for you, I echo your thoughts!!

  2. Jenny on December 9th, 2009 11:55 pm

    Ditto to both you and Kirsten! The story of how my husband and I fell in love is so much the same, though he says he knew when he met me that I was the one for him. Thank the Lord for our husbands!

  3. Brenda Williams on December 10th, 2009 12:10 am

    Beautiful!

  4. Stephanie Johnson on December 10th, 2009 1:14 am

    I love how serious P. Steve looks int he first picture. =) But I love this! You are both such great examples to our college group!

  5. Theresa on December 10th, 2009 1:22 am

    Ditto…I don’t know what I would do without Craig’s Love and Friendship!!

  6. Kathy on December 10th, 2009 2:26 am

    Wonderful story ….friendship and mutual respect has to be the foundation…looks will go, love will last. You are a beautiful couple and your love for each other shines.

  7. Sue on December 10th, 2009 2:37 am

    Amen, well said!

  8. Shana Stoll on December 10th, 2009 7:27 am

    a good husband . . . there’s nothing like it! so glad you’ve got one too! enjoy!
    blessings,
    shana

  9. Dayle on December 10th, 2009 7:43 am

    Good husbands make the world a better place. May your love only deepen with time.

  10. Heather on December 10th, 2009 7:47 am

    I LOVE this post!! I married my best friend too and I agree…it is that friendship that guides us through life. And it’s also that friendship that guarantees we will laugh until we cry anytime we get a date night (which are too far and few between)!

  11. Maureen on December 10th, 2009 7:56 am

    aweeeee. adorable!

  12. Katherine on December 10th, 2009 8:48 am

    My story is very similar and I’m so blessed to be married to my husband. Our friendship is the core of our marriage and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

  13. Lori Taylor on December 10th, 2009 10:04 am

    I can relate to your story Lisa. I have also married my best friend. I am a parent of a special needs son and this can definately take a toll on a marriage. It is our love and respect for each other that has made our 14 years together better than I ever imagined. I am one lucky girl.

  14. Gen on December 10th, 2009 10:27 am

    Ditto that! Isn’t it an amazing blessing from God to be married to your best friend? After thirteen years together my husband still amazes me!

  15. Stacy on December 10th, 2009 10:59 am

    Great post!

    I’ve only been married 6 months, but it is such a wonderful feeling!

  16. Chrissy on December 10th, 2009 11:28 am

    You are so right about friendship in marriage. I really believe it’s THE most important element of a success covenant. Without it, what do you have?

    You two are so cute together! :]

  17. Melissa on December 10th, 2009 11:42 am

    I can SO relate to this post! My husband wasn’t at all like the guys I dated in high school or college… and thank God for that! There is nothing better than being married to your best friend. :)

  18. Chrissie on December 10th, 2009 11:58 am

    You both definitely married the right men! Praise God for saving us from the others.

  19. Rhea on December 10th, 2009 12:06 pm

    Love the picture of the two of you. I’ve been married to my best friend for 15 years and we have six wonderful children together. Who could ask for more?

  20. Linda Z on December 10th, 2009 12:21 pm

    You 2 look beautiful together… like you were meant for each other!! :) I married my best friend, too! I’m so glad I did… he’s the best! :)

  21. Kristen Borland on December 10th, 2009 12:28 pm

    so sweet, lisa. i totally agree that friendship is key. we were friends for five or six years before we started dating (okay, before i would wise up and say yes to him!). our fav song right now is “lucky” by jason mraz and colbie caillat–”i’m lucky i’m in love with my best friend”.

  22. Jenny on December 10th, 2009 12:35 pm

    Sweet post. You two are such a good looking couple. Love your story…

  23. Kimberly Folgate on December 10th, 2009 1:27 pm

    My husband and I celebrated our 10 year anniversary this summer and I love him so. I certainly was not “looking” for someone when we found each other and I had dated a lot of duds, focusing on the wrong things - I am so glad that God’s plan for us is so much greater than our own.
    Congrats to you and Steve!

  24. julie on December 10th, 2009 1:58 pm

    Beautiful!

  25. Aimee on December 10th, 2009 3:26 pm

    I could have written this exact post about my choices of men and my husband

  26. Brittany on December 10th, 2009 3:32 pm

    Beautiful! I just married my very best friend last July, and life with him is amazing! At the end of the day, having your best friend by your side is the most comforting feeling in the world. I know that we can face anything holding hands!

  27. gina on December 10th, 2009 3:49 pm

    that is awesome ! LOVE it !

  28. Laury Booy Hoganson on December 10th, 2009 5:04 pm

    Goosebumps!! 5 years+ married here… God made me to love exactly the man I married. He had him in mind for me when I was created and I for him :)

  29. Rachel Smith on December 10th, 2009 5:26 pm

    So sweet.

  30. Corinne on December 10th, 2009 5:35 pm

    This is so wonderful to read! I know so many people who don’t have nice things to say about marriage, or their relationship. It’s hard sometimes to listen to negativity like that when you know what a good thing is and that it can be achieved.
    Bravo to you both :)

  31. Denise C. on December 10th, 2009 5:51 pm

    Beautiful post. I married my high school sweetheart in 2004, we celebrated 5 years this past June.
    We are the very best of friends.
    He called me 4 years after our break-up durning the end of my first marriage (a very bad marriage) and we picked up right where we left off. We dated and lived together before marrying in 2004. I cannot imagine my life with anyone but him. Ok time to go find him and hug him! ;)

  32. angie on December 10th, 2009 6:44 pm

    This is VERY sweet!

  33. Michelle F on December 10th, 2009 6:53 pm

    I love your story. Although I started dating my husband when I was quite young I definately had boyfriends who were not “the one” and am so glad I was wise enough to realize what a gem I had when we got together. We have been together 20 years (dating & marriage) and are great friends. I’d rather be with him than anyone else. Thank you.

  34. Jaime on December 10th, 2009 9:12 pm

    Sweetness.

  35. Bev on December 10th, 2009 9:49 pm

    Loved the post….. you are a beautiful couple. FYI Lisa you look like Giada ( food network ).

  36. Rhea on December 10th, 2009 9:58 pm

    OK I’m posting again. This is great - everyone is posting about their wonderful husbands. It seems like Satan is really working on destroying so many marriages, that I was getting so sad about this subject. For those who are really struggling the movie Fireproof is amazing - my favourite. Thanks everyone for putting my faith back in other peoples marriages!!!!!!!

  37. Destiny D on December 10th, 2009 10:25 pm

    You’re a gorgeous couple! Love is good… Destiny (Married 23 years!)

  38. Tamara on December 11th, 2009 12:00 am

    It’s so wonderful to have a reminder of what real love is. Thanks for sharing, Lisa! Oh, and has anyone ever told you that you have a seriously beautiful profile? You DO!

  39. Ashley on December 11th, 2009 10:02 am

    My sister and I were just talking about how nice it was to be married to your best friend! She just celebrated 2 years with her husband on the 8th and My husband (who is in afghanistan) will be celebrating 5 years in July.

    I so *love* your jewelry and your blog is fun to read also.

    Oh! Love the pictures too!

  40. AbbyS on December 11th, 2009 12:29 pm

    Thank you for sharing your very sweet thoughts of your hubby!!

  41. Daniela B. on December 11th, 2009 12:45 pm

    I agree with you, friendship is the real root for love..and I hope to mary soon my best friend Simon!I love him so much!!
    :)

  42. Laura on December 12th, 2009 9:09 am

    A big smile on me! Before I met my husband, I had dated several “jerk” men. They all had their looks until my husband. On our few first dates, I kept saying to myself, “Wow, it is really nice to have a man who can communicate at a high function level” (Note: It is hard to find the same communication level especially when you are in a deaf community. Many men were taken at that time. :-)

    Well there was something I put a foot in my mouth, I told my husband, ” I will never marry to man who graduated from a deaf school.” He just laughed and admitted he was one of the people who graduated from a deaf school — so rare for deaf mature men graduated in a residential school.

    Months later, we found more amazing commons. That’s where our hearts melt for each other, just like you too. Glad you found each other.

  43. Úrsula on December 15th, 2009 9:16 am

    I’m just 21 years old and I’m in love with my best friend too, it’s the best relationship I’ve ever dreamed, so girls, I’m very lucky!!

  44. Sarah Markley on December 15th, 2009 4:49 pm

    i’m glad i married my best friend too.

  45. o-girl on January 7th, 2010 11:13 pm

    You are truly blessed. If only I had listened to my gut instead of going for the guy “with the right look”. Thanks for sharing a little bit of your “love story”. :)

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